But maybe there's a saving grace to this, some way of ensuring that we'll survive this mess? Perhaps, but right now it looks pretty bleak - Musk promised to provide more details through his social media, but we'll update this article if we receive any more news ahead of the pathogen's release next week, but if not, we solemnly hope there's a heaven.
UPDATE: In the early hours of this morning, a signal was sent out from SpaceX's space centre in California, directly to products by produced by Musk's companies - with quite the strange intention. Tesla vehicles, for example, put the words "DON'T PANIC" on the dashboard, with their app displaying the message "Please could all Tesla customers remain in their vehicles for the upcoming test firing, to ensure your safety". Strangest of all, Elon's main competitor, Mark Zuckerberg of Facebook, held a live video conference for less than a few seconds, only needing that essential time to share his view. Mark simply uttered the words, "Welcome to planet Earth, or should I say, a planet now solely occupied by the rich." Seeming to have knowledge of Musk's intentions, we attempted to reach out to Zuckerberg, but with no response as of yet. Finally, an anonymous employee of Tesla motors spoke out in the silence, saying that the cars have an unlisted feature that 'we couldn't begin to comprehend' but for fear of something, she had to refrain from commenting anything more, other than providing us with a string of letters and numbers. If you'd like to have access this code, you can become a premium member for the low price of £3 a month - sign up on our website now to receive a discount on your next order!